dreaming in sepia
March 5, 2007Today, I have had the luxury of sleeping in the afternoon, curled up next to a lion, who has also decided to extend his napping hours.
I dreamt about my parents. My dreams are usually a mess, hacked up into bits and pieces that are, by turns, terrifying and funny. But this one had continuity to it, a grainy texture to each scene, as if everything was an old silent movie.
This is the dream:
The first scene shows the back portion of a church - the white steeple rising to meet clouds that looked hazy and askew. Then the lens that I am seeing through shows me and the Griffin living in a small, clean room near the church. I know it is clean because there are no books and where there are no books, there can’t really be anything else.
My mother, it seems, lives in a small room near ours. I go visit her. Hers is not a clean room. There are large, multicolored urns with elephant caricatures on them. There are Persian rugs, unscrolled or still wrapped in what seems to be purple plastic. She picks up after herself and does not look at me.
Next scene, The Griffin is driving (Driving!) me and Papa to a restaurant where we have decided to eat. Once there, I notice the table is covered with red and white plaid tablecoths. We sit down, careful to let Papa be in the center of it all. I believe I felt happy.
This scene is gone too soon. I see myself answering the phone, talking to my cousin K, arguing with her about God knows what.
Then in the next scene, there is a ruckus caused by my living relatives. They are angry about something. I think, automatically (in character, as always) that it is my fault, that it had something to do with the conversation I had with my cousin that day. But instead, I find out that they are angry with my mother. It was something she did, something that had to do with their Bingo game. There was someone she offended, they said. Then it was all of them. It is the last thing I remember, this phrase: All of them.
I remember waking up in the middle of this dream, thinking, Wait til I tell Mommy. As if she were still here.
When I actually do wake up, I feel nothing. I stare out a window and my eyes focus on a small leaf, floating listlessly a little above the ground.
+++++++
Three questions regarding this dream. One is:
Are they apart now, where they are?
Second is:
Is the purpose of this dream to warn me about something? Or is it just something that they sent me to let me know how they are doing?
Third, and most relevant question is:
Why are my relatives so fucking meddlesome?
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